revert and revibe

Hello!

It's a cold, and kind of sunny morning here in the UK. It's also the start of my 2 days off, woo hoo! I also have Easter Sunday off as my store is closed (score) so it's almost like I have 3 days off this week - except that our work week runs from a Sunday, so that means I have this Sunday and then next Tuesday of....Wow, I'm boring, haha!

Anyway, as the titles suggests, I've been thinking a lot about "RE" things in my life. Such as, RE-doing a lot of the things I used to do that I've found myself slipping away from over the past few years.

One of the things that took a hit was definitely this blog! I ended up going through this phase of wanting to blog, and then going to do it and then thinking "oh, maybe I'll do it later" and it kind of became a strange routine in a way, and then it would be months between each post, and that's a bit shit, considering I used to blog a good few times a week, with really interesting (to me anyway, lol) posts! If you've noticed, I have been blogging a lot more, as these early starts really do help! Although most of the time, I'm getting up to go to work etc, but even on the days I'm not working, I feel way more motivated and less lazy, which is almost a grace, as I can be super lazy!

Another thing is the way I look. I'm not happy with my body, or really the way I look all that much any more, but that's my own "fault" essentially I guess! The laziness ties in with this, as sports and fitness are my LEAST preferred thing in the whole world (next to spiders too). I've noticed that I've fallen out of the shape I used to be, and it's one of those age-old things that gets you down, and no-one but YOU can help yourself. Nobody can say or do anything to make you work, it has to be all about you! That's definitely where I fail hardest. I think I can get the motivation for certain things but other things are the biggest struggle ever! Look at how I used to look in 2011:

Pretty much my last photo shoot right there. And the 'tog that took these pictures ROYALLY PISSED ME OFF. This was from a shoot I did with Georgie back in April 2011 that I talked about here (a lot of the photos in this post died, sorry about that! I don't know why??) and the photographer NEVER sent me my photos, so the only ones I saw were this one and a head shot. He told me he kept sending me my CD and it kept getting sent back to him. Bullshit. Especially when you give him 3 DIFFERENT ADDRESSES to try! I contacted him again about a month ago asking for them again and he gave me another made-up story of "oh um I was robbed, so I don't have anything now". Yada yada yada. Basically, this has left me in such a weird loop with any kind of modelling. I even stopped working with Marc, all down to me again, mainly because of the whole body thing, and also because I wasn't even sure in myself any more. It's kind of sad in a way, because I've managed to lose that one line of my life almost.

BUT. With this NEW life-force I have acquired, I hope to RE-gain what was once lost! I've been looking up fitness classes and ways to keep in shape and to help you look your best. This is for ME personally, and is not a goal that I'm trying to achieve for others (before you ask). I want to join the gym, go to some classes and really get my strength back. I used to be able to practise Para for 3hrs a day. Now I can't even go for 10 minutes without getting so out of breath and wanting to flop on the floor! Pathetic! Lol! I just want to be hot again, haha! I've always wanted to try Pole - little known fact - and someone at work mentioned that she went to a class with her friend the other week and I though, hmm, why not?? I'm going to be so grateful for payday - my bank account won't be - but I'll be booking, and clicking away and hopefully finding some good things to get me back into shape!

After going to see Brooke Candy, I actually felt really proud of my body, as she is one of those women who can make you feel really good about yourself and to love what you have. So I started to love my booty (it's there!) and the way I looked in underwear, but I think the blow of the breakup really made me slouch into a void and made me hate the way I look. Don't get me wrong, I'm not about to go on some crazy power-diet thing and become all anorexic and stuff! I love food WAY TOO MUCH to ever give it up. It's more about not buying so many sweets and cokes and things like that...haha. I watched a video this morning about stomachs and in the video, the lady put a life-size plastic stomach on a plate and was basically saying that your stomach can only take so much, you can't overdo it, and that really shocked and surprised me to think that, actually, yes, I think that's one thing a lot of US are capable of, over-filling ourselves and perhaps not really realising it! 

Staying on the subject of food, I might be going to an American style place for lunch today....I hear they serve great pulled pork! THIS IS WHY I CAN NEVER NOT EAT LOL.

3 INSPIRATIONS FOR ME RIGHT HERE! KELLY, BROOKE AND GWEN.

avalanche

Hello!

Wow, since I've been back home I've been waking up super early all the time, mostly due to a whining cat at 5am, but usually around 6:30/7 every day and I don't feel tired! Amazing! I've never felt like that before after sleep, and I have the biggest bags under my eyes 24/7! I pretty much look like I'm dead with no make-up on - my face is pale, and my eyes have that "sunken" look to them haha.

Speaking of no make-up, today I'm meeting up with Dec to be his "fantasy" make-up model! It's going to be really fun and interesting to do! His make-up skills have always been really bad ass and when we were doing Manba still, I think that was just the beginning of his skills becoming great! He's always been awesome at art too, and the two kind of go hand in hand together. I've noticed that a lot of brilliant make-up artists and models are usually as equally talented with a pencil and paper as they are with brush and face!



Anastasija and Ryo are probably two of my favourite MUAs and models, that are both just so! Plus they're my good friends too!

                           

Anastasija (that's her bottom left!) and some of her make-up looks. She is awesome! She uses a lot of gore and goth themed styles for her make-up looks and you can find the occasional fantasy look too! She actually won first place in the Illamasqua Distinction in Make-up Awards for Non-Professional category! (her entry is the bottom right photo) Well done girl! <3 p="">

Ryo (that's her in the above 3 pics, except the bottom left) is just amazing! I've known her for a few years now, and the day I met her, we ended up modelling together for an exhibition! It was amazing! She usually does fantasy, edgy and colourful make-up looks, and you can always find something spooky there too! She also entered the Illamasqua Distinction in Make-up Awards for Non-Professional category (her entry is bottom right) and asked me to be her model! Unfortunately I couldn't as it was too short notice for me to get the day off work, but she did amazingly well! <3 p="">

But as well as these two amazing girls, there are so many others out there that are amazingly skilled! It really makes me wish I had gone further with make-up, but hopefully this year (finally) with some hard work and perseverance, I'm going to do something! I really want to do a Special FX Make-up course, but the only thing that limits me in a way is 1) the price, as these kinds of courses are always super pricey, even for the short courses, and 2) none of the courses are in London! Yes, I could travel, but it's the cost of travelling out of London however many times a week which gets expensive :s But, it's something I've wanted to do for so, so long. and I need to put my mind to it if I really, and truly want to make it happen! Another thing that's creative and interests me, is the production and skill behind the Jim Henson Creature Workshop. That's like, goal 2 I guess! It's an even more limiting thing that I'd love to do, because 1) there are no more workshops in the UK (Jim Henson was an American but a lot of his films were made here in the UK, and they used to have a workshop in Golders Green, close to where I used to live!) so I can't just travel to North London or wherever it is however many times a week, it would have to be in the USA and 2) I'd definitely need some kind of degree in SOMETHING to be able to even dream of working with such talented people! That is something I lack. Haha. I didn't go to Uni because I wanted life experience and to not get into debt. And that's exactly what I got and I've enjoyed it! 

On another note, I know I mentioned being in a hair show and I'm excited to say that the date has finally been arranged! I'm going to get my hair done at the end of this week! It's so exciting and cool! The only thing is that they've asked me to bring alone "rockabilly" style clothing or anything that looks like "Amy Winehouse" lol!!!! I HATE Amy Winehouse. I don't own anything like that! I guess I'll have to beg, borrow and steal!

Thank you to the kind comments on my last blog entry too, since typing it, I still do feel quite good about myself, and I think in a way, I didn't ever realise or think that I'd be able to feel this good about everything so soon after it happening. Maybe this is the way that things are meant to be? We can't see the future, so you never know what could happen! I know I can be strong, and with time on my side, I'll be able to work through this :)

Things like this have been keeping me sane and keeping me happy! See ya!

snap

Hello!

The next part in my updates is about my birthday (ahh) and the latest shoot I did!

So, yeah! I'm officially 21 and it's weird! Although not as weird as when I turned 20, which was kinda shit. I can legally drink in the US now, and...go to Casinos! Haha, totally awesome things that I can do now... :p

I was planning on going out with some work friends to a 90s club night thing, but didn't in the end, as my birthday happened to fall 2 days before payday; ouch. Instead, Adam took me out for dinner. We went to Wagamama's, and although I don't frequent it very often, it was really yummy!

A couple of weeks before this, I did a photoshoot at work with some other work friends. The pictures are probably going to be used for adverts and posters or something, not quite sure, but either way, here are the photos!

l-r; me, Nathaniel, Anastasija, Koji

Anastasija

Anastasija 

Koji & me

Koji

Nathaniel

What do you think? Anastasija did her make-up, Koji's and Nathaniels! Although I started his off ;D Her make-up is super fucking AWESOME and she should be doing make-up as a career or something! Really envious of her skills!

It was really fun to do, as we stayed quite late into the night, and we also shot in XXX (hence the pole photo) which is always fun ;) Hopefully, there will be another thing like this as it was good to shoot with everyone and have a good time in the process! My next shooting, or should I say, filming, is happening tomorrow with Marc. It's based on a long script he wrote for me a while back and it's certainly going to be interesting to film! Again, can't share with you as it will be nude! But i'll try and find some stuff once it's available and see if I can make it SFW for you all!

Oh, and one more thing before I go; do you like my new layout? I spent a little bit of time on it today, but needless to say, i'm unfortunately not the brains behind the whole thing, but I have done a fair amount of tweaking etc myself to make it, well, me! And you may need to update your bookmarks, as my blog is now registered under www.hibkoko.com !

See you guys soon!

Red Leicester

Hi guys! How are you all doing?
I'm back from Leicester! And i'm here to bring you a post about it. It's more like a photo spam really, as there's not too much to write about i'm afraid! My trip was mainly about meeting my boyfriend's family (and parents!) for the first time, but there was also a series of birthdays and anniversaries that also occured over the weekend.

So, on Friday, me and Adam laid around in bed and I made my serial-photo-spam blog for you all, and then realised we had only half an hour to get ready and leave before our train left..eek! That morning, I also did something funny, but something I had been planning on for a while! You wanna see?

Yeah, I shaved the sides of my head lol! But there's a reason behind it...my hair is really really not loving me right now and at the sides of my head, the hair was like, fried and crispy and no amount of hair repair serum or masques were going to save it, so I shaved it off! Well, Adam did, and I touched it up ;D It was something I was going to do for a while..and hey! There's a chick in egg magazine with her WHOLE head shaved and patterns in it! But i'm not about to rid myself of it all mind you!

Anyways, off this slightly off-track topic and back to what I was supposed to be talking about... We got to Leicester in the afternoon after watching Buffy on the train and after dropping our stuff off at Adam's parents house, Adam took me to meet his Mom..SCARY TIMES!!!! But it wasn't scary at all :D! Yaaay! Meeting the parents wasn't bad at all, after I was worrying they wouldn't like me and things like that, so i'm glad it went smoothly! On Friday we just stayed in and played Buzz!, which i've never played before but it was highly addictive....

Wendy & Mandy!

Saturday, me and Adam went swimming early in the morning, and then went to town during the day. In the evening we had a meal out at an all-you-can-eat World buffet (i've blogged about this kind of restaurant before) which was GREAT! and then afterwards, we went to Redeemer, which is an alternatve music club. It was "Cheesecake" night, and on the main floor they were playing 90s dance anthems and on the upstairs floor was metal, rock etc. They had Thundercats playing on TV's in the background!

And Sunday, there was a family BBQ, where I met more of Adam's family :) Overall, the whole weekend was really nice and relaxing! I'm back to work tomorrow, which is always weird after you've had a few days off! Here's the rest of our photos!

I had a food baby..lol!

My glow in the dark hair tinsel! I've been wearing this as well as silver glitter tinsel for the past few months and it's great! The UV lights in the club were much stronger than the ones we have at work so they showed up straight away! I had to take some photos... :D!

I hope you enjoyed the photos! With the above photos of my hair tinsel, i'm going to do a blog about them for you guys! They're really cool and ahh I love them :D

Oh! I got another photo from the Gal shoot I did! But i'm still waiting on the full CD :(

I hope you like it^^. It kinda looks like I have no brows, but I still love the photo! I should be going back to work with the photographer again soon, so i'm really excited! On Friday I have another Doctor's appointment as my other one was fail, so hopefully I can find out what's wrong :( In the evening i'm going for dinner with the company who created Hyper Japan and then on Saturday i'm going to a fashion event with model scouts! I want the weekend to be nooooow!

For those of you interested in going to Hyper Japan this year, they have a new competition! It's called UK Kawaii Star of the Year, and it looks to be promising! The details should be available soon, but here is where you can check out all the cool things going on!

See you soon guys!

I can't wait

Hello everyone! How are you all? It's the end of another week! Although I know some people class Sunday as the beginning of the week, as that's what they used to do in the olden days lol. My old, old Restaurant workplace used to do it :s

Today I had such a short and quick shift at work! Only 10am-2pm. Yeah, 4 hours isn't really anything but it feels even shorter when you finish at a time like 2pm! Everyone was like "WHERE ARE YOU GOING?! NO FAIIIR" haha. We had Popi from the Brighton store come and help us today, although I didn't actually see her until I was going! I hope she did okay! Our Camden store is so much bigger, louder and generally much busier than the Brighton branch, but she's fabulous so i'm sure she did fine :D

I'm really hoping that I padd my probation at the end of February! So far I think i've been doing a good enough job, but I guess I just have to wait and see! It would kind of suck to be told that they didn't want to keep me on after i've gotten used to the surroundings and getting on so well with everyone :( I still need to go out for a drink or something with a few people, as I want to get to know them better! Because of the "no-talking" rule at work, everyone is always dying to chat and talk about so much stuff! It will be nice to have a get-together after work sometime! *hint to those of you at work that may read this :p*

Eliana sent me her photos from the Art Exhibiton! And here are some for you to see:

L-R: Claudia, Me, Ryo

Claudia



Ryo

Not loads of photos but at least a few more to save to my computer! Of course, I still really want to see Ryo's photos! :p This week has also seen the arrival of my mail! At bloody last! Some stuff I ordered way before Christmas and just aftert has started to show up, which is great. I ordered some jeans from a Japanese store on Rakuten and they came really quickly! Here's a stock photo as I haven't taken a decent enough photo of my own just yet:


Mine are the ones on the right. My friend is actually coming over tonight to order the ones on the left because she saw this photo on my Facebook wall and loved them!

 They're so comfortable! And look really nice too :D They came with a thin brown belt that you can see in the left picture, but I probably won't use it...so I stored it at the back of my drawer haha. The only other thing to do with mail that I hate besides delayed post due to weather or random stuff, is the the "attempted delivery" notes they leave you! Grr! They are such liars sometimes! I've been home and waiting for things to turn up and they don't even bother to ring the doorbell! Some mailmen don't even both to put the date or time on the note so i have no clue when they "tried" to deliver anything so I don't know if they'll still have it at the depot or not! Grrrrr grumpy Eilish lol. I went to pick up something from the Post Office on Saturday morning and got back home to find ANOTHER note because noone was home...so i'm going to pick it up tomorrow before work. I *hope* it's a d.i.a. top that I ordered online, or some nail stuff that I ordered!

Here is what I picked up on Saturday:


A d.i.a. grab-bag from Lily! Thank you so much!


This makes up for me not being able to get my hands on a 2011 d.i.a. lucky bag! And what do we have?
- Cream t-shirt
-Red long sleeve top with open back
-Gold studded bra
-Black & white print top with black sash and gold hoop detail
-Black sweatpants with pink string, border and print
-Olive onepiece with black bow and gold hoop and chain detail
-d.i.a. eco bag

I'm so happy! I looked and bidded on the 2011 bags online but they're so difficult to get hold of! People have bought 10+ bags and even though one bag retails at Y10,500, they're selling them off for Y20,000 each! I saw a bag online for Y40,000 AND Y70,000!!!! WTF. I won a 2010 lucky bag..bag haha. I didn't realise it was just the bag until i'd bidded but never mind, it's quite a nice bag (even if it does say "NEW YEARS BAG" on it haha)

I also met Caryn, Dec and Kazu (Dec's bf) briefly the other night to pick up the things that Caryn brought back for me from Japan! They were going to Karaoke but I couldn't stay as my funds are low right now (all this shopping I know...) and I was staaaaaarving!




d.i.a. top, egg Feburary and x2 Candy Doll face powder

 It's been quite a d.i.a. week I guess! Oh! And a package came in the mail from Laura! She sent it on December 20th and it's taken nearly a month to get here! I haven't taken any photos but inside came two nail varnishes from HEMA (looove), some fake eyelashes, caramel waffles (yuuuummy!) and a kit to make my own king of sweet stuff! It's a Christmas thing really but I don't care! Still going to make them and post them here! In some other news, i'm going to Oslo, Norway in February to see Monica and Ingvild! I was going to go in the first weekend of March but I had already booked a mini holiday away with my friends in October so I couldn't go :( But i'm going for 2 days or so at the beginning of Feb! It will be cold, but so so lovely to see them both! So, yeah! How has everyone's week been?